send me an e-mail
by martha f. mcmullen

For me, e-mail has almost replaced the telephone, and regular mail is only a memory most of the time. Dropping in and dropping out comes easily. I am more a part of others’ lives, and they mine, than I ever was before. E-mail brings me the convenience and intimacy of a letter, the immediacy and spontaneity of the telephone.

I revel in technology that allows me to contact family and friends at any hour. I receive responses with joy whether they come in five minutes, a day, or a year. Indeed, one friend checks in regularly only at the end of the collegiate basketball season. We are intense for a few weeks over my Duke and Tennesee women and her UConn ones. We also share when classmate Madeleine Albright makes news or is on TV or there is some other public event involving a college classmate. I have known this woman forty-five years, but we never used to chatter. It is e-mail that has opened this fun and meaningful contact.

Right now, one of my friends is in Togo for six months. Last year, he was in Tajikistan for eleven months. Through e-mail we have been able to maintain currency and share experiences in our lives while they are happening. Letters would be too formal, too distant. How long does it take for a letter to come from one of these countries? Telephone, except for a brief Happy New Year, is out of the question.

“Are you awake?” asks the e-mail I send to several friends. It is after midnight. I turn my wakefulness to e-mails from around the world. I reply as they call me and select send later for each one. Not everyone needs to know I am doing this in hours usually reserved for sleeping. If someone responds to my query, we exchange a few notes—activities, concerns of the day, what we are doing up so late—intimacies and details that deepen the friendship.

People who understand me know to send e-mail. I love it when the address of someone I haven’t heard from in months pops up on my mail list. I feel fortunate I have a good memory and can recognize infrequent senders without having to consult my address book.