HELLO-GOODBYE:
Putting Together and Breaking Apart a Business Relationship
by cheri britton and elizabeth barbour

Once upon a time there were two lovely women who were very good friends. They discovered that their professional paths and missions seemed to overlap…and thus a partnership was born.

It was obvious from the beginning of our relationship that we were destined to work together. We knew we were to combine our joint talents of motivational speaking and inspired coaching along with our passion for being catalysts for bringing together communities of women.

We began with regular lunches, then power-brainstorming sessions and eventually we moved in together into a downtown office and made our partnership official. In two years of scheming and dreaming and two months of professional cohabitation, the Solopreneur Woman™ Program was launched.

We had no idea that in one year we would experience phenomenal success and then deliberately decide to separate. One full year of energetic partnership, collaboration and co-creation was to be followed by that same intentional energy as we went our separate ways.

However, the goodbye wasn’t abrupt. On the contrary, it was very intentional and required as much thought to orchestrate as did our coming together. It wasn’t like ripping off a band-aid. It was a slow process that allowed each of us time to heal from the inside out. We spent a lot of time talking honestly and did a fair share of crying as there were so many different emotions involved in this kind of separation. We set conditions of satisfaction together, determined the timing, decided when to inform other people and we asked for support from partners, coaches and friends. We strived to maintain authenticity and integrity at all times, even when that felt challenging to do.
We had a belief that when we negotiated the business pieces there would be a win-win. At all costs, win-lose wasn’t an option because at the heart of our professional collaboration is a deep friendship that supersedes everything else.

The P’s & Q’s of Partnership Although we were only formally a partnership for a little over one year, we learned a tremendous amount. As two independent, outspoken, self-driven (and did we mention independent?) women, we knew that we had to put equal emphasis on not only what we were creating but how we were creating it. Here’s what we learned.

1. Choose Your Partner Wisely Well duh…that may seem obvious but it is the MOST critical factor in any successful partnership. Too many people go into business with someone they like because it seems fun. But its oh-so-much-more complicated than that. It’s a “must” to be equally passionate about what you’re creating but not necessary to be identically skilled. In fact, if you have different strengths you’ll go much further, faster. When seeking a partner, take time to assess your own strengths and weaknesses and then identify the qualities and characteristics in your ideal partner that will complement you.

2. Be Conscious Communicators Having deliberate, two-way conversations and constantly evaluating how communication occurs is crucial. Scheduling regular meetings for both personal and professional dialog deepens your level of trust and keeps you aligned with one another. What’s most important is setting ground rules for how the communication takes place. Some examples of what we found to be helpful include: setting win/win expectations, determining strategies for how to disagree and even using a timer to ensure both of us got equal air time (especially important for two screaming extraverts!)

3. Get Help! Michael Gerber, author of The E-Myth Revisited would say that working ON the business is even more important than working IN the business on a day-to-day basis. Sometimes it’s hard to see the forest for the trees, so calling a third party perspective can really be helpful. We talked to other people in partnership, we read lots of business books and we even hired a coach to help us enrich our collaboration. (She also kicked our butts in the process and helped us focus in amazing ways.)

4. Don’t Lose Yourself in the Process Being in professional partnership is much like being in a committed romantic relationship. Ideally, you merge on some levels but you keep your individual identities. Less healthy relationships are like making a cake where you can’t separate out the individual ingredients once they’re mixed together. Healthy relationships are more like Chex® mix—you can separate out the pieces and parts but you enjoy the complimentary flavors when you grab a big handful. And besides, it’s fun to tease each other about who’s the nutty one and who’s the corny one!

Post Script
We both feel a sense of relief our parting is no longer a secret! We’re both clear that we’ve been called in different directions to do our work in the world. And we’re also really clear that our friendship is stronger than it’s ever been because we fully support each other in pursuing our life’s passion.
In the past year, Cheri has been formalizing her concept of B.O.O.M. Thinking ™ (Break Out of Old Mindsets) and also deepening her consulting work through Whetstone Consultations. She has realized that the mission of Solopreneur Woman™ is directly in line with her own personal mission. Therefore, she’ll continue the work of Solopreneur Woman™ delivering coaching, workshops, e-zine, etc. Cheri sees the logical integration of Solopreneur Woman™ concepts with BOOM Thinking™ concepts and is open to the various ways this will manifest in the coming year.

Elizabeth has felt the tug to use her coaching and consulting skills in the adoption community for a very long time. As a happily reunited adoptee, she is passionate about helping people touched by adoption form healthy relationships with all family members. The time has finally come for Elizabeth to pursue this dream of being known as a coaching expert in adoption relationships and she is building a new company called Adoption Relationships Coaching and Consulting. She will continue her 1:1 coaching work through her company, The Inspired Entrepreneur.

We have both benefited tremendously from our work together and know that it was the perfect partnership at the perfect time for both of us.